


What the Water Gave Me

by rhymeswithpapaya



Category: Free!
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Future Fic, I wanted a more mature rating but I'm too nervous to do it, I'll warn you if I change my mind, Implied Hazuki Nagisa/Ryuugazaki Rei, M/M, Memory Loss, One-Sided Tachibana Makoto/Nanase Haruka, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-13
Updated: 2014-03-20
Packaged: 2018-01-15 13:14:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1306114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhymeswithpapaya/pseuds/rhymeswithpapaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin and Haru have been dating in secret for two months when Rin's jealousy and spite get them into their first real fight. Before they can resolve their differences, Haru is in an accident that causes him to lose his memory. Should Rin tell him everything that happened, or should he pretend they're just friends? Rin's at risk of losing Haru for good either way, while Makoto doesn't hide his intentions to keep them apart. Meanwhile, Haru wonders why a certain redhead won't stop staring at him, and why he has trouble sleeping alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic will go back and forth between Rin and Haru's POV by chapter. Each chapter also has a flashback before the current timeline. Rin's up first!

****

**_Then_ **

****

“Rin! Go get your friend out of the water. We’re about to close the pool,” Mikoshiba slapped Rin in the back of his head with his wet towel.

Rin scowled, bringing a hand up to smooth down his hair. “Tch. Why is he my ‘friend’ when he’s annoying you and Haru the rest of the time?” He knew his swim captain was talking about Haru; after all, who else had to be bodily removed from the pool at the end of every joint practice at Samezuka? The rest of the Iwatobi team was already in the locker room, having given up on Haru for the time being. Rin pointed over to Makoto. “Make him do it.”

Mikoshiba's already bright smile spread ever further across his cheeks as he pulled Rin off the locker room bench he was sitting on. “They’ll just say something like, ‘Haru will come when he’s ready.’ You’re the only one that doesn’t care about getting on his bad side.”

Despite his protests, Rin was eventually ejected from the locker room and into the natatorium. He hated Mikoshiba so much, and not just because he kept trying to get Gou’s phone number.

 _Fuck_. Rin really didn’t want to be alone with Haru. Not today. As he hesitantly walked towards the pool, he heard Haru’s graceful stroke breaking through the water before he actually saw him. When he did see Haru, calmly crawling down the lane away from him, completely unaware of anything except the feel of the water on his pale skin, Rin’s heart _staggered_. He crossed his arms defensively, like it could stop his body from reacting to his old friend. _Newly remade friend_ , he reminded himself. _A male friend_.

About a month after the relay that brought Haru and the rest of the Iwatobi gang back into his life for good, Rin had gotten worse at defending himself from the feelings that were steadily threatening to overwhelm him. For so long, all throughout his time in Australia and for his first few months back in Japan, he’d focused on shutting everyone and everything out that would get in the way of his goals. No one could help him reach his father’s dream; it was something he had to earn for himself. At least, that’s how he rationalized it to himself when the pain of losing a race to Haru after countless hours of training became too much to bear.

But when Haru had come to him on the day of the relay, his normally indifferent expression working through an astounding range of emotion, Rin could no longer keep up the pretense. It was too exhausting to keep pushing Haru away when he realized he couldn’t be happy unless they swam together again.

His next, tentative realization, once they were cautious friends again, was that he wanted _more_. So much more. Rin had tried to pretend that the feelings he’d had for Haru in middle school weren’t overwhelming him again, but it was no use. He found himself coming up with lame, embarrassing excuses to spend time with Haru, determined to get to know him ever better than before. There was so much lost time to make up for. But every time Haru got near him, he froze, too nervous and self-conscious to react. It was worse when they were alone together, though. When they were around Makoto, Nagisa, and that speedo-megane Rei, he and Haru seemed casual and comfortable in the way they bickered and teased. When he was alone with Haru, he felt his breath quicken and his face flush whenever he got too tongue-tied to speak, or to respond to Haru’s blunt and cool attitude.

And now, Rin stood at the edge of the pool, waiting for Haru to make finish his circuit in the pool and his hands couldn’t stop _shaking_. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off of Haru at all during practice that day, much to his embarrassment. Luckily, no one had pointed it out or teased him about it. The sight of Haru in his jammers, poised on the starting block, sent shivers down his spine more than once.

He was hyperaware of Haru when his palm met the wall and he stood up to catch his breath. Haru looked up at Rin but, as usual, his expression didn’t betray whatever he was thinking.

“What are you doing here? Do you want to swim again?” he asked Rin. Then he took off his goggles and swim cap, gently flipping his hair over his eyes in a way that was so _Haru_. Rin felt his mouth drop when Haru looked up at him, his bright blue eyes glimmering in challenge, his lips slightly parted, chest gently heaving as he inhaled the natatorium’s humid air. How did he make everything he did look so damn sexy? Rin’s knees felt weak.

“Rin?” Haru caught his attention again, but Rin still couldn’t trust himself to respond. This was normally when he would turn away to hide his blush and make some snide comment to defend himself. Instead, he found himself sinking onto his knees in front of Haru, burying his face in his hands. This was too much. Being around Haru like this… it was unfair. His heart wouldn’t be able to handle it for much longer. Unrequited love was a bitch.

He sat like that for a couple minutes, his heart beating in his ears. Haru didn’t say anything, but Rin could tell that he didn’t leave, either. Then… he felt wet hands circle around his wrists and pull his hands away from his face. When he opened his eyes, Haru was looking up at him and… no… was that… affection? Is that the emotion that crinkled the corners of his quiet eyes and tugged at the corner of his mouth? Before Rin could think any further, Haru grabbed him by his jacket collar with both hands and pulled him down, close to him. Their faces were so close together he couldn’t remember how to breathe, but he didn’t dare pull away. Haru’s eyes flitted to Rin’s lips only seconds before he closed the gap between them, pressing his lips against Rin’s.

The kiss was soft and warm. And over too quick. If Rin hadn’t been too surprised to close his eyes like Haru had, he might not have realized that he’d been kissed at all. When Haru pulled away, Rin saw a faint blush coloring his cheeks. And that’s the moment Rin’s own face grew hotter than it ever had in his life.

Haru laughed and moved his hands to wrap around the back of Rin’s neck, where he ran his fingers through the crimson hair lying against his nape. “I like Rin, too,” he said simply.

Rin choked, his brain moving too fast. “Too? W-what? I never said I liked you!”

“It’s okay that you’re too embarrassed to confess to me, Rin.”

“Confess? Why would I confess to you?” Rin backpedaled out of habit of denying himself. When he realized what he said, he clapped his trembling hand over his mouth, wishing he could take it back.

Haru smiled wider this time, wider than Rin had ever seen, and he pecked Rin on the forehead before letting him go, his hands sliding back into the water beside him. Rin nearly whimpered at the loss of contact.

Rin uncovered his mouth to speak, to apologize to Haru for being an idiot, but another voice cut him off.

“Haru? If you don’t get out of the pool now, we’ll miss our train,” Makoto said as he entered the natatorium, already showered and dressed. “And Gou wants to have a team meeting.”

Rin knew that Makoto hadn’t seen anything, since Haru was already underwater again, but he still felt like he’d been caught. He didn’t want Haru to leave, not now. But when he resurfaced, he accepted Makoto’s hand and finally got out of the pool. When they passed by a still stunned Rin, Haru said, in a low voice, “You can tell me next time.”

“What, Haru?” Makoto asked. Haru simply shrugged, his face resuming it’s usual placidity, but not before Rin saw the mischief in his eyes.

 _Next time_ , Rin repeated to himself as he watched his two friends leave. Next time, he would be ready. Next time, he wouldn’t be reduced to a teary mess after Haru left just from hearing those miraculous words… _I like Rin, too._

**_Now_ **

Haru had never been one for texting, so Rin knew that desperately wishing for a text from him was a completely futile activity. Still, he clutched his phone tightly in his palm, nearly breaking it in frustration. His bounced his knees, half to keep warm on the cold train and half to keep himself from releasing the anger and regret building inside him in one long, loud scream. It was Saturday and he was headed back to Samezuka with his overnight bag sitting at his feet. He and Haru had been dating for two months and this was the first time Rin wouldn’t be staying over at his house in Iwatobi for the entire weekend.

He’d been the one that started the fight. They bickered all the time, but this time… this had been different. He couldn’t stop seeing Haru’s hurt expression now just like he couldn’t stop himself from hurting him in the first place. Everything spun out of control the second they walked into Haru’s house together, returning from hanging out with Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto, and Rin’s sarcastic comment hit too close to home.

And now Rin had been kicked out of Haru’s house, possibly for good. “I’m going for a walk,” Haru had said when they’d torn into each other too far. “You shouldn’t be here when I get back.”

 _You shouldn’t have left, you idiot_ , Rin chastised himself too late. But still, the deadly look in Haru’s eyes told him that he wouldn’t listen to anything else Rin had to say. Probably not even an apology. In the end, both of them were too stubborn and Rin had angrily packed his bag up and stomped to the train station. Once he got onto the train though, he’d never been more sorry about anything in his life. He was gripped with fear that because he left, he and Haru could never be the same again. The thought was too much to bear. But even if Rin apologized, would things go back to normal? Or had he broken them down too much?

Rin arrived at the Samezuka station and considered turning back around to Iwatobi, but his feet stuck to the platform. He was too terrified that if he saw Haru again too soon, they would break up. Maybe if they both had time to cool down, they could gain some perspective. He could’ve laughed at himself for trying to think rationally about Haru. There was nothing rational about the way he felt about him.

Dejectedly, he trudged back to his dorm. Nitori was in reading in his bunk when he got back to his room and threw himself onto the lower bunk, fighting to keep back tears.

“Rin? I thought you weren’t coming back until tomorrow,” Nitori said, leaning over the side of the bunk to peer at Rin. When Rin didn’t respond, he grew concerned. “What’s wrong? Did you get in a fight with your mom? Or maybe Gou?”

 _I wish it was that simple_ , Rin groaned, covering his face with his arm. Rin lied to Nitori every weekend; he said he was going home when he really spent all weekend curled around Haru. None of their friends knew that they were dating.

Rin made himself reply to Nitori, knowing his silver haired kouhai wouldn’t leave him alone until he’d gotten an answer. “Something like that,” he said.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” he answered automatically. He rolled over on his bed, clutching his phone close to his chest. Nitori went quiet, respecting Rin’s need to be left alone for the time being.

Rin squeezed his eyes together harder, pretending that the tears hadn’t started to trickle out of them. Eventually, he fell asleep, his entire body too depressed, lacking energy to keep him awake.

He was jolted out of a fuzzy dream when his phone rang. Without looking to see who is was, he answered on the second ring.

“Haru?” he said, his voice thick with sleep, but his heart pounding and his entire body alert with the need to hear Haru’s voice.

“Onii-san?” the voice on the other line replied.

Rin sighed and sank back into his bed, his body shaking from the rush of adrenaline. “Ah, Gou. What is it?”

Gou sniffled a little before she answered. “Onii-san, something’s happened…” she trailed off. He heard multiple voices in the background; wherever she was, it was crowded.

“What? What’s happened? Something bad?” he could hear the panic creeping into his voice. Nitori, still in his bunk, leaned over again when he heard Rin’s side of the conversation.

“It’s… it’s Haruka-sempai…” she cried, and this time she really was crying. Rin’s heart dropped into his stomach and his entire body went numb. Time seemed to slow to a sickening pace before his little sister finished her sentence. “There was an accident… and he’s not waking up…”

A sob caught in Rin’s throat and he pressed a fist to his mouth. Everything inside him felt empty and cold. He heard Gou calling out to him but her words just slipped past him as he dropped the phone onto the bed, curling up into a ball. _This is all my fault_ , was the single thought that ran through his head. It was overwhelming and loud and everywhere and he didn’t know if he would ever have another thought again.

He felt Nitori brush past him and reach for the phone to finish the phone call with Gou.

“Rin, Rin,” Nitori shook him to get his attention after what felt like an eternity. Rin looked blankly up at him. “Gou says that Haruka-sempai is in the hospital. A car hit him and he ended up hitting his head really hard. He isn’t awake yet, but we should go visit him.”

Rin wasn’t sure how Nitori seemed so composed, but then again, he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He didn’t even remember Nitori leading him from Samezuka and to the hospital. All there was was the empty pit inside him and the strangely weightless, unreal atmosphere surrounding him. Was it shock? When his father died, had he felt like this?

The next thing Rin remembered was Gou running towards him and wrapping him in a hug, crying into his chest. He looked up and saw Makoto, Nagisa and Rei, all of them teary eyed, too. Makoto had Ren and Ran, his younger brother and sister, strapped to each leg and his parents were seated in the waiting room.

“You came, Rin,” Makoto said, but everything about him seemed to be laced in disbelief. “Nitori, too.”

Rin forced himself to wrap his arms around his sister and interact with the people around him. They were here for Haru, too. But they couldn’t know how much this hurt him; to them, he was just another friend.

“How did this happen?” Rin swallowed hard.

Makoto looked away, like he didn’t want to answer the question. “Ran chased a cat into the street, but she didn’t see the car coming,” he stroked the top of his sister’s head. “Haru went after her without even a second thought and pulled her out of the way, but he ended up hitting his head so that Ran wouldn’t get hurt.”

Rin’s eyes were glued to Ran, who cried into her brother as she remembered the accident. It wasn’t her fault, Rin knew. And he couldn’t blame Haru for his selfless act. He was always the first one to respond in bad situations. But there was one part of Makoto’s story that stuck out in his mind.

“He was with you?” he asked Makoto, feeling anger for the first time since Gou’s call. Haru said that he was going to go for a walk, but really he’d run off to Makoto… didn’t that only prove Rin’s point that they’d been arguing over earlier? Jealousy stirred in his gut, ugly and painful. He didn’t want to think about his fight with Haru, not now, but seeing Makoto there didn’t help.

Makoto looked confused by his question. “I was coming home from the store with Ran and Ren and we saw Haru coming home from the beach. It looked like he’d been out by the ocean for a few hours. I told him it’s too cold to be at the beach in December, but he just ignored me and… that’s when the accident happened.”

Rin immediately felt guilty for thinking the worst of Haru. He bit his lip and hugged Gou tighter. _Why did things have to turn out like this?_ It was his fault that they got into an argument, his fault that Haru went and froze on the beach, and now his fault that Haru wasn’t waking up.

The group stayed quiet for a while after that. They all sat in the waiting room, hoping for good news. Rin told Nitori that he didn’t have to stay after they’d been there for three hours and he’d caught him yawning more than once, but Nitori insisted on staying with Rin.

Finally, a doctor in a white lab coat approached Makoto’s parents, but he spoke loudly enough so that everyone could hear him.

“Nanase’s condition is stable,” he said, and everyone let out a collective breath. Nagisa cried in relief and hugged the doctor until Rei dragged him off. Rin felt his sister grab his hand and he realized that he’d started crying, too. “It will still take some time for him to regain consciousness, but we can let you see him if you’d like.”

There was a commotion as they all attempted to pile into Haru’s tiny hospital room until the doctor told them to go in two at a time. Gou pushed Rin forward and he stumbled towards Makoto, which ended up being a nomination for the two of them to go in first.

Rin took a deep breath outside Haru’s door, full of relief and hope. He’d had a lot of time to think, and now he knew that he would apologize to Haru the second he woke up. He would never let himself be separated from Haru again.

Makoto opened the door and they walked in together. Rin felt himself grow weak when he saw his boyfriend lying in the hospital bed, pale against the neutral bed sheets and hospital gown. His black hair stuck to his forehead and, without thinking, Rin reached forward and pushed it away, his hand lingering for a second as he pushed the soft locks behind his ear. Makoto didn’t comment, but that was because he was too busy releasing the tears he hadn’t wanted his siblings to see.

Rin pulled up a chair beside Haru’s bed and sat down while Makoto continued to struggle to hold himself together at the end of the bed. Haru wasn’t hooked up to anything except a heart monitor, and Rin decided to take that as a good sign. Hesitantly, he reached for Haru’s hand in front of him and took it in both of his. It was cold.

“I’m surprised he didn’t get hypothermia,” Makoto sniffed, and Rin realized he’d made his comment out loud. “What was going on today? Do you know why he was so upset?”

“What makes you think he was upset about something?” Rin tried to control his temper when he replied.

Makoto shrugged. “I can just tell. With Haru, I can always tell.”

Rin struggled not to react to Makoto’s statement; he felt so bitter towards Makoto for being there in that room when he should be able to have Haru to himself. It was selfish and cruel but Rin didn’t care. Haru was his.

“Did you two…” Makoto began to ask, looking between him and Haru, but then his eyes locked somewhere else. Rin followed his eyes to look at Haru’s heart monitor and heard the faint _beeps_ increasing.

Slowly, Haru opened his eyes, groaning at the bright hospital lights and the pain in his head.

“Haru,” Rin breathed, his eyes beginning to water again. He’d never felt happier in his life. “Haru, thank goodness you’re awake. You know, you really…”

“Who,” Haru cut him off, glancing at where their hands were intertwined. “Who are you?”

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not every "then" flashback will be as long as this one was... I just needed some relationship establishing fluff!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru remembers Rin's late night visit... and then nothing at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone that's read this fic so far! Time for Haru's POV.

**_Then_ **

****

Haru stifled a yawn and considering getting a bath. He’d already been able to swim at Samezuka earlier in the day, but now that the weather was getting colder and the Iwatobi pool was closed, he didn’t get as much water time as he would’ve liked. But really, he never got enough water time. Even that day, Rin had been nominated to finally pull him out of the pool, but he had been successful. That was probably because Haru had kissed him…

The feel of Rin’s lips on his had been on Haru’s mind all night. He sat in his living room at the table, trying to finish his homework, but he’d ended up with his head on the table instead, the paper of his workbook sticking to his cheek.

When he reflected on what had happened at the pool earlier, a tiny hand of worry and fear started in his belly and wrapped tightly around his heart. He had no idea what he’d gotten himself into. Somehow, in the moment, when he’d seen Rin hiding behind his hands, overwhelmed with _something_ , Haru had reacted. It had been thoughtless and careless of him to push Rin like that when he clearly wasn’t ready. Still, in the couple of months since he and Rin had been reunited for good, it felt more and more natural to be around him until not being around him wasn’t an option anymore. Haru hadn’t thought of Rin romantically until it felt natural to reach up and kiss him. And when he found himself saying, “I like Rin, too,” he knew that he never meant to say anything else.

There was a soft knock at his front door and Haru stubbornly forced himself to his feet to answer it. He didn’t even take the time to wonder who was visiting him this late on a school night. Because, knowing Rin, it made sense that he was the one standing on the other side of the door, looking everywhere but at Haru.

Rin started talking without introduction. “I was just going for a run, like I do every night… I thought since I happened to pass by your place I should say hi,” he said lamely. Rin was a little out of breath from the run still and Haru wondered if that's why his face was red. He hoped it was that Rin was embarrassed and shy like he was.

“It’s late,” Haru stated. His only defense against Rin’s false overconfidence was his own bluntness. He gripped at the edge of his front door to steady himself. Should he invite Rin in? He wasn’t sure what to do, or what Rin wanted from him. Maybe he was there to tell Haru that they shouldn’t see each other anymore, especially not after Haru had done. But Haru hoped, as he watched Rin scratch the back of his neck under his little ponytail, that Rin had come to see him for a different reason.

A cool breeze worked its way up from the ocean and settled over them. It seemed to snap Rin back into his senses. He finally looked Haru in the eye and Haru could see his own uncertainty mirrored back at him.

Rin cleared his throat nervously. “I know, but I didn’t want to wait until next time,” he said, his voice low. It was almost too low for Haru to hear it; he leaned forward slightly and looked at Rin’s mouth. When he registered what Rin said, but before he had the chance to understand his meaning, he leaned towards Haru, too. Haru’s eyes fluttered shut of their own accord. Then he felt Rin’s hot breath on his lips a second before their lips actually met.

It started out as another chaste kiss. But then Rin opened his mouth and Haru couldn’t help but follow his lead. It was terrifying but exhilarating; both of which were feelings he’d only felt when swimming with Rin. This was sweeter though and he quickly felt himself melting under Rin’s touch. Rin had wrapped his arms around him and was holding onto him like a life raft in a storm. Haru gently placed his own hands on Rin’s hips.

He was breathing hard when Rin finally separated from him. Rin smiled and brought his hands to the sides of Haru’s face where he stroked his pink cheeks with his thumbs. Haru was stunned by Rin’s loving expression, emphasized by glazed eyes and bruised lips.

“I’ll see you next time, then,” Rin said quietly, like anything above a whisper would break the moment between them. He briefly brought Haru’s forehead to his lips before releasing him. With a shaky laugh, he waved and ran down Haru’s front path.

Haru stayed and watched him leave. He stood in the doorway for a long time after Rin’s figure was gone. His heart felt light and a smile ghosted over his lips.

 

**_Now_ **

Opening his eyes was such a pain. He really only bothered because he wanted the people talking in his room to be quiet. The pain in his head was too much to bear with the added annoyance of their conversation.

“Haru,” the boy holding his hand spoke to him. “Haru, thank goodness you’re awake. You know, you really…”

“Who,” Haru interrupted him, “who are you?” He pulled his hand away, exhausted by the effort. The boy looked hurt, and a tickle in his chest told him that should bother him. But in the moment, it felt like a chore.

The boy ran aggravated hands through his long, red hair. “Are you serious? Are you fucking serious, Haru?” he growled. It sounded like he wanted to be angry, but it came out as defeated instead.

“H-haru-chan?” the boy standing at the end of his bed squeaked out, covering his mouth in shock. He was tall with messy brown hair and Haru could see the tears leaking from his kind, green eyes. Still, it wasn’t hard for Haru to keep his expression blank; he didn’t owe these people anything, he didn’t even know who they were.

But then a moment of horror swept through him and his hands started shaking. He honestly didn’t know where he was. Not only did he not know the people that claimed to know him, but he also had no idea how he got to where he was. It looked like he was in a hospital, but what had put him there? Why did his head hurt so badly?

Abject fear must have shown on Haru’s face because the boy at the end of the bed cried out a dramatic “Oh God,” before he ran from the room.

Haru heard voices out in the hallway and he guessed that the boy must’ve gone out to speak with a doctor. He clutched at his sheets and the redhead noticed his distress. It looked like he wanted to say something, but he was panicking, too.

The redhead’s response to Haru’s memory loss seemed genuine and maybe a little overdramatic. Maybe if he could just remember one thing about the boy that was currently having trouble breathing, his memories would come back to him.

“What’s your name?” Haru asked cautiously. He unintentionally leaned away from the boy, as if he was expecting backlash.

The boy read Haru's body language and quickly stood up, walking to the window on the side of the room to make Haru feel safer. “My name is Rin. Matsuoka Rin.”

The name didn’t sound familiar. Haru tried to hide his disappointment. “And… who are you?”

Rin made a kind of choking noise and covered his face with his hands. He turned his whole body to the window and leaned his forehead to the glass. Haru couldn’t think of anything comforting to say. Was that his job? To say something comforting to Rin?

Haru jumped when the door to his room slammed open and a blonde boy ran to his side looking distraught. “Haru-chan! You can’t remember me? Or any of us?” he gestured to a number of people that flooded into the room behind him. “Don’t tell me you forgot all of your friends, Haru-chan!” The boy was leaning against the bed, his face too close to Haru’s as he studied him. Haru curled his legs to his chest. It was the only defense he had left. He considered telling the noisy group to be quiet, but his voice caught in his throat. It felt wrong, he didn’t really want to have to raise his voice. He just wanted to run away and hide somewhere quiet. His nerves were a jumble and it was making his stomach uneasy.

A hand clamped down on the blonde’s shoulder. The brunette from before dragged him backwards, away from Haru’s bed while keeping his own distance as well. “Nagisa, you’re scaring Haru. He doesn’t know what’s going on.” He then turned to Haru. “I’m sorry, I tried not to let anyone in, but they just couldn’t believe it…” he trailed off. Haru was almost surprised to see how quickly he'd composed himself after running out of the hospital room only moments before.

A man in a white lab coat pushed through a group of teenagers and two adults that could only be the brunette’s parents. “Nanase-kun, I’m sorry for the intrusion. Would you like to talk for a bit? I’m sure you have a lot of questions to ask right now.”

Haru’s mouth felt dry so he could only nod in response. Slowly, everyone made their way out of the room at the doctor’s orders. But Haru didn’t want to be alone with the doctor. He was afraid of what he might learn.

“Haru,” the brunette locked eyes with him, “would you like me to stay with you?” Haru considered it for a moment. How did he know that Haru didn’t want to talk to the doctor alone? “I know a lot about you, we’ve been friends for a long time,” he winked, reading Haru’s mind yet again. “My name’s Makoto, by the way.”

Haru didn’t say anything or alter his expression, but he wanted Makoto to stay, so he did so without being told. As Makoto took the seat by Haru’s bed that Rin had been using before, he saw Rin scowl at Makoto before leaving the room with everyone else. What was that look for?

“Rin’s just worried about you,” Makoto filled in the blanks. Haru cut him a look. “Sorry, sorry, I’ll try to stop.”

Haru sighed. He would never get used to this. It was easier, though, than having to take the effort to say something for himself.

The doctor proceeded to tell him about the accident he’d been in protecting Makoto’s little sister. He assured Haru that his scans had come back clean, but that amnesia was a common side effect of head trauma.

“When will his memory come back?” Makoto asked. He’d patiently been wringing his hands together, asking questions in all the right places while Haru relaxed and tried not to think about anything too hard.

The doctor looked down at his clipboard. “It’s hard to say. We have no way of knowing whether this will be temporary or permanent. I don’t want to get your hopes up. Still, I personally think your chances of recovery are very good, Nanase-kun. A lot of patients say that returning to their normal activities helps them recover memories. I suggest you try to do the same.”

Haru nodded silently and closed his eyes. Makoto and the doctor kept talking but he wasn’t listening anymore. It was unnerving to think that he would have to go through daily routines like they were completely natural to him. He wondered if it was even worth it to recover his memory. _Have I always been such a pessimist?_ he questioned himself.

“Haru,” Makoto interrupted his thoughts. He opened his eyes and saw that the doctor had left. “How are you feeling?”

He sighed shakily. There was a question that wouldn’t get out of his mind. “Do I have parents?”

Makoto didn’t look him in the eye. “Yes, but they’re in Tokyo. You live alone here in Iwatobi. I called them and left a message… hopefully they’ll be able to call back soon. I’m sure they’ll want to talk to you.”

Something in Makoto’s tone told him that he shouldn’t hope for much when it came to his parents. His chest tightened when he wondered what kind of person he was that could be so easily ignored by his own parents. At the same time, though, learning that he lived alone meant that he would probably have a lot of time to himself without anyone to bother him.

“The doctor said you can go home tomorrow afternoon,” Makoto went on like he knew that Haru hadn’t been listening to the doctor much at all. “I live near you so I can come pick you up and show you around. How does that sound?”

Haru took a hard look at Makoto for the first time since he’d woken up. He seemed kind and trustworthy. Did he deserve a friend like this? And what about his other friends, the ones that seemed so upset about his amnesia? Especially Rin. He had a hard time reconciling the facts that his parents barely spoke with him at the same time he had a pack of friends at his bedside.

“Fine,” Haru replied. It wasn’t harsh, just tired. He didn’t know what else to say.

Makoto smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then. Get some rest, Haru.” He patted Haru’s hand with his own before getting up and leaving the hospital room.

Haru stared at the ceiling tiles for a while, trying to organize his thoughts. Then he realized how thirsty he was. He glanced over at the beside table and found a water bottle. Makoto must’ve left it for him. The water felt cool in his dry throat and it had a calming effect on his nerves. He fell asleep easily after that and dreamt he was underwater. Rin was there with him, urging him to swim faster to the surface.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
